Twelve years ago I married a wonderful woman. Twelve years ago I treated her like a wonderful woman. I would bring her a yellow rose every day we were together. I would call her in the middle of the day to tell her that I loved her and how much she meant to me. I held her tightly in my arms to show her that I would always be there for her.

She came from a horrible family life. Her father abused her both physically and sexually. She grew up only knowing the love of her friends. I was determined to make up for all that lost love.

Then somewhere in those twelve years I lost that determination. I became self absorbed in what I wanted and stopped concentrating on the woman that I loved. She hung in for a long time. It was something that she was good at doing. Then with no fuss, no fighting or anger. She left. Like an idiot. I just left her go.

This does have a happy ending. I did get her back. I will tell you that my purpose in life is to not let her forget how beautiful she is. I will never let her forget how she completes me as a man. I do not see her faults or imperfections. All I see is the gift that God has given me. I will never loose that gift again!!!!

Treat your spouse like the special gift they are from God. I do not get her a rose everyday, but I do something different for her everyday. I want her to know that I am working on myself and our relationship. I have come to understand that marriage is one of the hardest tasks in my life. Women and men think very differently. If you are not working on your marriage, you marriage is not working. Hey that is good. Maybe someday someone will quote me.

I did not know what kind of woman I had. Everyone else did. Men, you have to curb your pride and you have to look at what you have. Realize that it can all be taken from you in a second. When you stop searching how to fulfill yourself and experience how to fulfill the people that you love, the happiness that you have been seeking will be found.

Most guys will call me whipped. I would agree. I could care less. I did not realize that she was not looking for a savior. She had already saved herself. She was looking for someone to appreciate, love and most of all accept her. In the beginning, I wanted to be her savior. It was ok because I was non-judgmental. The problems arose when I tried to fix her. Instead of showing her what it feels to be loved, I tried to show her how to love.

So if I can offer you any direction, I would say to get to know your spouse. He or she should be your best friend. Once you have that, those big things that bug you so much about them just seem to go away and then you can concentrate on love. When you can look into your partner's eyes and feel that love well up with tears, you have found true happiness.